Musings Of An Indie WriterSunday, February 28, 2010
A Smashwords Update
- Which Art In Hope
- A Dash Of Spice: Erotica For Good People
- Chosen One
- On Broken Wings
- The Sledgehammer Concerto
- For The Love Of God
- The Storyteller's Art: How not to bore your reader to sleep, tears, or homicide
- Colored Shadows, Unsetting Suns
- Caucuses, Cabals, Assignations and Trysts
- From The Bit Bucket: (A)Musings on Engineering, Supervision, and Management
For now, there will be no more. My cover artist, Donna Casey, has suggested the theme and plot thrust of a new novel to me, and I'll be at work upon that until whenever. Anyway, the reason I mention it here is twofold. First, the images themselves have prompted some inquiries. Second, over the years a number of persons have written to ask if there were some way they might help to defray the expenses I face in operating Eternity Road. Now one exists: the fiction offerings are "Set your own price." Feel free to pay what you can and enjoy what you receive in recompense.
And of course, thank you, most sincerely, for being patrons of Eternity Road!
Let My Cry Come Unto Thee: A Sunday Rumination
Hear my prayer, O Lord, and let my cry come unto thee.
Hide not thy face from me in the day when I am in trouble; incline thine ear unto me; in the day when I call, answer me speedily.
For my days are consumed like smoke, and my bones are burned as an hearth.
My heart is smitten, and withered like grass, so that I forget to eat my bread.
By reason of the voice of my groaning, my bones cleave to my skin.
I am like a pelican of the wilderness; I am like an owl of the desert.
I watch, and am as alone as a sparrow upon the housetop.
Mine enemies reproach me all the day; and they that are mad against me are sworn against me.
For I have eaten ashes like bread, and mingled my drink with weeping.
Because of thine indignation and thy wrath: for thou hast lifted me up, and cast me down.
My days are like a shadow that declineth; and I am withered like grass.
But thou, O Lord, shalt endure forever; and thy remembrance unto all generations.[Psalm 102, Verses 1-12]
Have you ever known someone who never needed anything from anyone?
Died at birth, didn't he?
Possibly the hardest thing for an American of our time to do is to ask for help with something. We're so bloody proud of our independence, our limitless competence, that to humble ourselves enough to admit to such a need feels like kneeling to a conqueror. It's one of the outcroppings of our humility deficit; it might be the worst of them.
Paradoxically, as we get better and better at easing our labors, alleviating our pains, and generally cushioning the discomforts of life, each of us sinks ever deeper into mutual need. The most competent man alive can't sustain his own life with his own produce; design, build, and maintain all his own machines; and get to everywhere he needs to go under no power but his own.
Leonard Read's famous essay "I, Pencil" is on point here. If you haven't read it, please do so now. This can wait.
To live decently and in some approximation to happiness, we need others of our kind. Human interdependence is a simple fact. Yet untold amounts of effort go into denying it.
The economic concept of the division of labor, delineated by Dr. Read's "I, Pencil" essay, is a recognition of our material interdependence. Our all but universal desire for love and acceptance speaks to us of our emotional interdependence. But we have a bit of difficulty coming to grips with our spiritual interdependence.
I'm not thinking of our dependence on (and helplessness before) God at this point. I have in mind the need each of us experiences, sporadically throughout life, for spiritual sustenance as provided by other persons.
Spiritual health requires a conviction of personal significance: the sense that one matters. Matters to whom? Matters how? These are personal questions; no two of us would answer them the same way. Yet in each and every case, whatever answer we make must include a somber clause:
You can bet the rent on that.
Yet even the most solidly grounded, most devout Christian, firm in his faith and resolute in his decisions and actions, will experience the occasional lapse in his conviction of significance. God's always there; we can always apply to Him. But we're all taught that, though all prayers are answered, sometimes the answer isn't what we asked for, or would have preferred.
One of the chief blessings of life is others to share it with. It's a wretched soul indeed who'd have to live it alone.
Christians are strongly encouraged to form congregations, and to involve themselves with fellow congregants to whatever extent their situations will support. The most obvious forms of that are group rituals and devotions, such as Sunday Masses, and community outreach toward the less fortunate and persons laid low by chance. These are both good things, which I commend to everyone not constrained by paraplegia or a barred door that locks from the outside. But it's my belief that each of us, at some time in his life, will need more, and that it will be God's will that he seek it from his fellows.
When I wrote last Sunday about the need to be heard, I had this in mind. It strikes me as a Christian obligation to hear others' voices when possible, and to provide meaningful replies. But the reverse of that coin is the willingness to speak -- to voice one's own needs, when and as they insist, that someone else might hear and offer aid. For if no one ever says "I need you," as we excessively independent Americans are all too reluctant to say, then those who stood ready to listen will begin to disbelieve in the open-arms / open-ears obligation of a Christian, and will cease to be available. Why man a post upon which no one ever calls?
I've been circling my major point, as usual. There is a need to be heard, for the sake of our significance to one another. But there is a complementary need to hear, for the sake of our significance as Christians...to ourselves.
When Jesus said, "Ask and ye shall receive; knock, and it shall be opened unto you," He was speaking of more than our petitionary prayers. We need one another, and one of our deepest, least frequently expressed needs is to be needed.
To say "I need you, on this day, in this hour...let my cry come unto thee," frankly and humbly to another person is among the least understood and most neglected of all the acts of charity.
May God bless and keep you all.
Anybody feel like dancing?
Who cares if there’s no music playing. Oh, well, maybe Ann Coulter and I can sing a little duet. From my point of view, she sure doesn’t hit many sour notes. In fact, sometimes I think Annie girl is the only non-Obama fan with any vision. I hate to say it, but at the big Summit last week, I’d have rather heard her trading barbs with the President than Senator McCain. I mean, man, listening to one of the greatest Americans, John McCain, spitter and sputter made me cringe. Likewise, listening to the Democrats made me sit in bemusement as da dems back the nag that nobody’s cheered for since it stumbled out of the healthcare starting gate many months ago.
But even if they could, des Dems, with Obama leading dis bunch of wrong way Corrigans, won’t change direction. And you wonder why. Even though a huge ditch is in full view, it’s full speed ahead. I have to ask. Why don’t nobody (I was born in the Bronx) think to grab the steering wheel and pull it to the right? Have all of the anointed one’s aides drunk the cat’s kool-aid? Why do they seem so comfortable heading into a Mondale sized political abyss?
Pourquoi?
Well, try looking at it from their perspective. Let me ask you. Why did the kamikaze pilots auger into the ships at Okinawa? Why did the Vietnameze fight the French and us with such feracity? Because they were true believers. Dems are true believers, too. Up to a point. Which brings us to something that’s missing from all the analysis. Da dems seem fearless about political defeat. They have no urgency. They don’t seem to care that most Americans are foursquare against them. Diametrically opposed to them. What’s going on? Just a tad bizarre? Well, color part of what Hannity, Savage, Hewitt, O’reilly, Ingraham, Beck have missed green. The forest for the trees. Why do the dems keep on veering left into oblivion? Because they have a huge green cushion. They feel they can’t get hurt. Their butts are protected. They feel bulletproof. This is the source of Obama’s deep seated condescension. It’s the source of Pelosi’s and Reid’s confidence. Axelrod is part of this. They all feel protected from harm. Da Dems who are going to get electorally slaughtered in 2010 and beyond feel that they’re sitting pretty. It’s the cushion. Or you could call it a kevlar vest, or a golden parachute, an airbag, a backstop. Not only do they mean the same thing to these political pukes, but they’re made out of the same material. Paper. Yes paper. What in the world makes these scallywags think they’re insulated from political harm? You guessed it. MONEY. They have a 600 billion dollar cushion.
Why do you think only a small percentage of the Stimulus money’s been spent? Because, boys and girls, I’m convinced that it’s part of a huge slush fund that’s been promised to all these politicians courting electoral disaster. Basically, these darn Dems care more about money than they do their leftist ideology. That’s why they deserve no respect. That’s what separates them from honest to goodness true believers. These pitiful bottom feeders would be calling for moderation; the straight and narrow if they didn’t have billions to fall back on. With Holder as attorney general, though, and ethics nowhere to be found, the billions are under Obama control. Remember the missing monies, for example, sent to Florida districts that don’t exist? I think It was a setup so in later years the Dems can say, “we should have kept better track of it but we didn’t.” Hello. We’ve got an accomplished tax cheat running the IRS. If these folks can’t keep track of their own money, how can they be trusted with ours?
A political party can’t go straight when it’s crooked.
And it can’t be caught if evidence (like billing records) magically disappears. Imagine, 600 billion dollars to spread around. There aren’t enough handcuffs to go around. All this is what Hannity and the rest are missing. These bums can retire to lives of splendor while the rest of us try to prevent the good ship United States from listing anymore to the left and possibly, with debt-flooded front and rear compartments, going belly up. Obama and his merry men (Pelosi included) are like commanders of a U-boat that shot its load of torpedoes at us and one hit below the water line. Friends, I’m not abandoning ship. It’s fight to the last girl time. Meanwhile, if somebody on the inside can grab that wheel from Obama, please do it. If we have to march on Washington to get this ship righted, by all means, let’s do it. We still have the power to make Sherman’s march to the sea look like, well, you guessed it, a Tea Party.
People who I consider to be domestic miscreants are, in my opinion, trying to drive us into the sea as if we were the 29th Division fingernail-clinging to Omaha Beach. If we’re gonna die, let’s do it inland. I’m not sure exactly what the tactics should be. I just may gather every copy of Saul Alinsky’s book I can get my hands on and dump them into Boston Harbor. I do know that it’s not time to shut up. It’s time to step up. I’d rather live by Nathan Hale’s final words than let my country down. When people are trying to take away our freedoms and transform our nation from sea to shining sea, it’s synchronize your watches time. Like American heroes said on Flight 93.“Time to rock n’ roll.”
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Islam—the verdict.
Are Islamic teachings inherently violent? Yes. Can Islam be reformed? No. Can Islam be reconciled with our way of life? No. Is there such as thing as a moderate Islam? No. Can we continue to allow Muslims to settle in our countries? No.
These few sentences contain all the information about Islam that you will ever need to know. It is still useful to know more about the way your enemy thinks and how to exploit his weak points, yet there is no point in spending too much time on studying the failed Islamic culture.
Does the word “Islam” conjure up images of Nobel Prize winners, great universities, innovative surgical techniques, moving choral works, vibrant art, enlightened civil government, an elevated status for women, or simple rationality?
Of course not. Rather, after more than 13 centuries of Islam, its defining images are of carnage, degradation of females, lex talonis, theocracy, irrationality, hatred of infidels, and strong appeal to losers, malcontents, fanatics, and haters of growth, color, and life itself. If there is such a thing as Islamic innovation, it is in the fields of gaining entry to aircraft with weapons or explosives and designing and planting roadside mines. Whatever decency is in Islamic society lives in the shadow of obscurantism.
Westerners welcome or tolerate the emigration of Muslims to our lands. In this manner, they engineer the destruction of their way of life.
“Fjordman — The First Five Years.” By Fjordman, Gates of Vienna, 2/20/10.
Don’t leave home without it.
Since President Barack Obama obviously cares so much about health care, and I care so much about second amendment protection, especially as it pertains to lil’ ol’ blond haired, blued eyed me, I thought it appropriate to let the brown eyed handsome man in on a little known medical fact that I’m privy too, having dated a few men in the health care and law enforcement fields.
To wit: The most common cause of erectile disfunction in rapists is none other than a snub nosed 38 special in the hands of a female willing to use it.
E-Book Review: Meddlers In Time
Fran here. When I announced, only a few days ago, that I intended to do this, I had little idea what I was letting myself in for.
E-publishing might be the wave of the future, or one of them, but the E-pub world needs some pretty stringent filters applied to it. I've had to wade through a lot of crap to find a single decent novel on which to comment. It's a function of the universal belief that 1) everyone can write, and 2) everyone has a worthwhile story to tell.
Sad to say, nearly everyone is wrong. Perhaps the proliferation of E-pub reviewers will help to thresh the corn from the chaff...if such a proliferation should occur.
Mr. Watson has produced a future-past fantasy of considerable dimensions. Its characters hop gleefully from 21st Century New Zealand, to a far distant planet they call Transit, to 9th Century England, to 8th Century New Zealand, and assorted points in between and beyond. Their spatio-temporal gate allows them unlimited flexibility of movement through both space and time, at apparently no cost...except for the cost to the various organizations whose military goods they "requisition" for their undertaking.
The thrust of the novel is the protagonists' desire to create a time-branch, one that would avoid the accelerating totalitarian tendencies of this time line. They aim to do this by bringing high-tech firepower to 9th Century England, that the Danish incursions that so retarded social and technological progress there might be thwarted and a genuinely free society nurtured.
Much of the early going of the book reads like a recipe for exactly that sort of enterprise. It's replete with equipment lists, training schedules, and orders of deployment. Fascinating, in a way, but this reader was itching to get on to the main event, and discover the inner motivations of the Marquee characters.
The adventure proceeds smoothly -- for the protagonists, that is. The Danes find themselves on the nasty end of quite a bit of advanced ordnance, and are beaten back repeatedly without the good guys suffering a single casualty. Local Englishmen rapidly warm to their new protectors, who instruct them in replicable technologies they would normally have discovered by trial and error over the course of the coming centuries. In the process, the mingling of 21st Century and 9th Century Anglosphere cultures produces some interesting alterations to the latter.
The book has its satisfactions, but it also has two flaws of note. First, there are a significant number of "mechanical" mistakes. These include numerous spelling and punctuation errors, not all of which could be attributed to typos. Also, the RTF format copy I downloaded suffers from many, many changes of font size and shifts to and from italic, with no clear reason for either. Were these corrected, the reading experience would be greatly improved.
Second, as is often the case in a story written to reify the author's desires, the heroes win far too easily. The time-traveling lovers of freedom are too well supplied with every imaginable resource, both human and material, owing to the infinite possibilities of unlimited free movement in space and time. Beyond that, not one of the Marquee characters appears to have any significant character flaws or dark motives. The result is a lack of dramatic tension. This reader reached the end of the book hoping against hope that some force -- perhaps another time-traveling band, this one dedicated to establishing totalitarian rule over all places and times -- would come along to give the heroes a genuinely hard time. It doesn't happen.
Meddlers In Time has its pleasures. In particular, it was educational to read a well-thought-out plan of attack for "hothousing" a subsistence culture toward an advanced state. Mr. Watson has obviously put a good deal of thought into the problems involved. Perhaps there's a time-space gate on his shopping list, if not on his storeroom shelves!
Overall assessment:
- Theme: I can't grade this, as there was essentially none.
- Plot: C / C+
- Characterization: C-
- Style: C
In short, a fun read, but no more than that. Perhaps Mr. Watson has better shots in the locker; I hope to see some.
Friday, February 26, 2010
A Bit of Government “Comedy/Irony?”
Your semi fearless blogster had an amusing encounter this morning on the way to the gym and reasons for levity of late being sparse he has decided to share it with both of his faithful followers.
Only last week the “first lady” Mrs. Michelle Obama/Soetoro appeared on one or more of the insipid morning boob tube venues to decry childhood “obesity”. It is as yet unclear which of the 22 members of her White House staff broached the idea of such a crusade (perhaps in view of recent trends the term should be jihad). This concept of nanny statism follows closely on the heels of trial balloons being floated over government controls of junk and fast food.
Where was I? Oh, yes; the narrow road near our residence necessitated us coming to a stop in front of a neighbor’s residence in order to allow the boarding of a school bus by a rather portly pupil who attends the public elementary level indoctrination center located approximately 900 feet away. As the school bus paused with appropriate flashing red lights and obligatorily deployed octagonal stop sign as well as bumper barrier, the pupil of some 10 years of age huffed and puffed up the slightly inclined driveway and lumbered aboard the bus. Two more stops were required of the bus on its 900 foot journey in order to board pupils who live directly across the street from the school.
It appears that the school district prohibits pupils from arriving and departing its facilities by any means other than motor vehicles even though each and every roadway adjacent to any of the institutions displays flashing yellow lights indicating reduced speed limits often monitored by revenuers minions of the law replete with electronic detection devices even on “snow days” when the schools are vacant.
Goodness, how times have changed since the old days when we young’uns were forced to trek “2 miles up hill (both ways) in blizzard conditions” to the little red school house. It must be the price we pay for our rulers keeping us safe, healthy and protecting the environment.
So “yesterday.”
The Hungarian city of Pécs, an important Christian center since the 4th century, had its churches turned into mosques, its schools into madrassas, its laws into sharia and its citizens into corpses, slaves, dhimmis or exiles during its 140-year occupation by the Turks.
“From Meccania to Atlantis - Part 13 (3): Harpo, Gekko, Barko, Sarko.” By Takuan Seiyo, Brussels Journal, 2/17/10.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Intolerable then. Intolerable now.
1774 The intolerable Acts
Remember them from American history class? Parliament decided to punish the people of Massachusetts for misbehaving. Partying much too heartedly. Legislate them into submission. The Acts included:
Closing Boston Harbor till the colonists paid for all the tea they forced it to drink. Having Parliament take away local power to try British subjects for crimes against freemen. Taking away colonial land extending from Canada to the Ohio River and ceding it to Canada. Calling the meeting of colonists in public, “rioting”, which was against the law. Imposing the quartering of British troops. These and other acts were designed to scream loudly and clearly that Britain had absolute authority and unmitigated power to rule over the colonies. The Acts were to be enforced by Parliament with no say from the people of Massachusetts, kind of like President Obama is trying to jam his health care vision down our collective throats against the will of the people.
Colonists viewed the acts as an arbitrary violation of their rights, and in 1774 they organized the First Continental Congress to coordinate a protest. As tensions escalated, the American Revolutionary War broke out the following year, eventually leading to the creation of an independent United States of America.” (Wikipedia)
That was then.
This is now.
2010 The intolerable Acts
Holding a dog and pony show on Feb. 25 reminescent of the old westerns where the bad guys set obvious traps for the good guys, President Obama is trying to stage a ruse for the Republican Party, and, in effect, the American people. This is his patented smoke and mirrors ploy. I implore you, Republicans, don’t sign anything. Don’t agree to a partial compromise. Obama is not bargaining in good faith. He’s demonstrated many times he prides himself in going against the wishes of the American people come hell or high water. The American people are thumbs down on ObamaCare. Make sure you leave the meeting with all your fingers. Don’t forget, seductive language with no truth attached to it is Obama’s bread and butter. If something doesn’t feel right, reject it. Just like Obama rejected Republicans when the crucial meetings about ObamaCare were being held, don’t let the most partisan President in the history of this nation weave his little verbal web around you like that “scurvy spider” Mr. Potter tried to do with George Bailey in, “It’s a Wonderful Life.”(It’s a wonderful life)
Obama wants to be able to say to the American people, “See I tried to be bipartisan and include the Republicans in the approval of what they call, “ObamaCare.” But they wanted to start from scratch. And I, Barack Obama, know this is what the American people want and need. Look, 30 million American are uninsured.” What Obama fails to disclose is that virtually all of that 30 million get medical care if they want it. That’s the dirty little secret Obama tries his best to hide. At the same time, this nation can provide medical insurance for 30 million people without going broke doing it; without giving up control of our medical system to the government, especially considering what a great job they’ve done bankrupting social security, bankrupting medicare, causing the sub-prime lending mess (Chris Dodd and Bernie Franks), mismanaging the post office, and the motor vehicle bureau and the IRS, just to name a few incompetencies of the federal government that jump right out at me. ObamaCare would quickly usher in:
1. Sky high insurance premiums.
2. A ton of heath related new taxes, on everything from band-aids to open heart surgery.
3. A huge jacking up of the national debt. A ballpark figure of 7 trillion dollars over the next ten years.
The laugh is that Obama says his ObamaCare will actually lower the national debt. Wow, the President must have a clown in his belly the size of Texas. But Obama’s Intolerable Acts don’t stop with HealthCare. They continue like used car salesmen who won’t take no for an answer. I’d add in Obama’s decision to thumb his nose at the 70 or so percent of the American people who want no part of losing their doctors and getting their premiums and taxes raised. And senior citizens being told by bureaucratic boards of non-doctors, “your particular case considering your age, doesn’t quality for the expense of open heart surgery you need to stay alive. We’re sorry, but you’re too old. We have a handout that explains it.” How many people would end up hearing those words? A country full of them. Incidentally, Bill Maher has been making the TV rounds lately saying average people aren’t smart enough to understand why many parts of ObamaCare are so good for them. So if you need extra help understanding information, take a free pamphlet.
ObamaCare for dummies.
Back to Obama’s actual words. You’ve heard him say he didn’t splain’ ObamaCare carefully and slowly enough. If condescention were an Olympic event, Obama would stand alone. Even when he’s not talking down to us masses, there’s no dispute that Obama has made an art form of going against the will of the people from which all Presidents derive their power (The U.S. Constitution). Then there’s all those interceptions Obama, who’s supposed to be the quarterback of our team America throws. I suspect on purpose. I do declare the way he makes one questionable decision after another makes me think he’s trying to throw the big game. To begin with, I’m talking about using his left arm to sign earmarks amounting to more than 10,000, and amounting to millions of dollars (or is it billions?) And using that left arm and left field logic to squander a cool 800 billion in his financially draining, now infamous, Stimulus Bill. While losing 4,000,000 jobs in the process. Then the magic man comes up with this “saved jobs” figure which not only is impossible to verify, but meaningless. “More than ten percent of the jobs the Obama administration has claimed were “created or saved” by the $787 billion stimulus package are doubtful or imaginary, according to reports compiled from eleven major newspapers and the Associated Press. Based only on our (the Washington Examiner” analysis of stimulus media coverage in the last two weeks, The Washington Examiner has created this interactive map to document exaggerated stimulus claims. The map, which will be updated as new revelations appear, currently reflects an exaggeration by the Obama administration of about 75,000 jobs, out of the 640,000 jobs supposedly “created or saved.” (Washington Examiner)
Is there an umbrella scheme that makes Obama spew out imaginary figures at such a blithering rate? Does it all come down to the socialist/marxist creed calling for redistribution of wealth. If it only were that simple, albeit that sinister. If Obama and Alinsky aren’t philosophically tied at the hip, then John Edwards has a reputation for telling the truth. To lil’ ol’ blond haired blue eyed Rachel, a President whose watchword is, “Redistribution of Wealth” is bad, but what makes him intolerable results from a host of other Intolerably good speeches but bad decisions. Like trying to sell the idea that driving up the national debt to 16 trillion dollars in just one year is the kind of medicine we need. Truth be known, it’s the equivalent of forcing the Jim Jones brand of KoolAid down the nation’s financial throat.
Intolerable Acts. Let me send them at you in machine gun style. Like Obama spends money.
Shorting McChrystal by 10,000 troops. Have you checked the Afghanistan GI casualty figures lately? Obama cuts General McChrystal a thin piece of replacement pie. And troops die. Letting voter intimidating Black Panthers go scott free. Giving enemy combatants Miranda rights and trying the 9/11 savages in a civilian court, which mark my words, will end being the straw that broke Obama’s political back; that showed him to be a man without a backbone. Afraid to offend terrorists’ (all over the world) delicate sensibilities. Sometimes I wonder whose side Obama is on. Making believe there are no more terrorists by not saying the word. (Barack has apparently flip flopped on this so maybe he’s now admitting to a degree of reality.) Lying about his intention to broadcast ObamaCare negotiations on CNN. Calling (using Pelosi as proxy) the tea party members a bunch of astroturf (financed my billionaires) racists. Tea Partyiers are also criticized for being “angry”. And I guess if she were alive, Pelosi would have criticized Americans for being angry after Pearl Harbor. And I guess it was a mistake for the colonists to feel angry after the Battle of Bunker Hill and Stamp Act, 1765 and the Townshend Act, 1767 and the Intolerable Acts. And, heavens to Betsey, no one had a right to be angry after 9/11. The sense of Pelosi arguments melt like ice cream on a hot summer day when you think them through. After saying Obama’s wife and kids were off limits when it comes to negative stories about them, Obama failed to denounce one of his most avid supporters, Seth MacFarlane, whose show, “Family Guy” mocked the Palins for having a Down Syndrome child. And the intolerably long list of misdeeds goes on. Using his office to undermine a Cambridge, Ma., police officer who arrested a foul mouthed, race baiting Harvard pal of Barack’s. Knowing the global warming data was cooked and trying to serve it to the American people. Beginning the attempt to take over the means of production (GM, Ford). Right out of Alinsky’s “Rules for Radicals.” Lying about his intimate relationship with ACORN, and then getting caught two days ago with the video to prove him to be no less than a pathological liar. Lying about his close relationship with Bill Ayers. Lying about his knowledge of the racist, anti-female bent of his religious mentor, the heinous Jeremy Wright. This is after pewing with the American hating racist for more than twenty years. Naming a bigot to the Supreme Court (“white males are inferior to hispanic women,” Sonia Sotomayor). Humiliating America by apologizing to every two bit tin horn human rights ignoring dictator for the so called sins of America. Filling the White House with Van Jones type self proclaimed communists, socialists and one NAMBLA supporter who happens to be The Obama administration’s ‘safe schools czar’ Kevin Jennings. Perhaps the tallest tree in a forest of intolerability.
Okay, of course I could go on and on, but I’m sure you get the point.
President Obama has provided us with an absolutely Intolerable 13 months. By far the most left leaning President in history, Obama seems to be doing his best to destroy this country brick by brick, value by value, ideal by ideal. As I write, Obama plays carnival barker at his ObamaCare meeting. History, let’s hope, has a special place reserved for what has to be the worst President in United States history. If Obama uses the poison pill (reconciliation) to pass ObamaCare, the coming march on Washington will make Sherman’s to the sea seem like, well, a Tea Party. Which is tolerably certain.
On Becoming More Curmudgeonly
Your Curmudgeon is here to tell you: It's not easy being a Curmudgeon Emeritus. The honor could be retracted at any time. Worse, that Fran person is constantly hectoring him about his sourness, his inability to see the beauties around him, and his overall crankitude. Does the idiot have no idea whatsoever what draws readers to this dive?
But enough of that. The problem has waxed and waned over the years. Frankly, your Curmudgeon thought he'd have an easier time of it recently, owing to what the media morons have taken to calling the "Great Recession." But no! You can hardly throw a rock at a keyboard without landing at a website filled with recommendations on how to be happier. Take this, for example:
Some scientists have argued that happiness is largely determined by genetics, health and other factors mostly outside of our control. But recent research suggests people actually can take charge of their own happiness and boost it through certain practices.The billion-dollar question is, is it possible to become happier?" said psychologist Sonja Lyubomirsky of the University of California, Riverside. "Despite the finding that happiness is partially genetically determined, and despite the finding that life situations have a smaller influence on our happiness than we think they do, we argue that still a large portion of happiness is in our power to change."
Lyubomirsky spoke here Saturday at the annual meeting of the American Association for the Advancement of Science. She and colleagues last year reviewed 51 studies that tested attempts to increase happiness through different types of positive thinking, and found that these practices can significantly enhance well-being.
The article proceeds to list five personal choices that will increase one's overall happiness.
GAHHH! It's no longer safe even to read the news! Will no one rid your Curmudgeon of these meddlesome smile-mongers?
Clearly, it's time for a counter-program. Herewith, your Curmudgeon presents his Top Five: five ways to increase your orneriness and enhance your standing in your local Association of Cranky Old Coots.
1. Ignore the silver lining. That lining is razor thin. What really matters is the dark cloud inside it. Okay, So Ed McMahon has brought you one of those huge cardboard checks. Now what? Who's going to deal with the tax consequences? What about all those pesky reporters and paparazzi? And what about the hordes of relatives-out-of-the-woodwork, every one of whom has a sob story and a hand outstretched, palm upward?
2. Try to see the bad in people. Everyone has a dark side. Your friends all have flaws, don't they? You do your best to ignore them and concentrate on their positive qualities. You fool! Others have rejected them for those very flaws; why haven't you? If you don't know what evil lurks in a man's heart, use your imagination! See that Salvation Army worker with the bell and kettle? Have you any idea what he does with his wife, kids, dogs, cats, and Internet connection when he goes home at night?
3. Be negative about your future. Love? Promotions and salary increases? Fame and fortune? Bah! Love is another word for dependency and obligation. Higher titles and salaries always come with more work; worse; more people of higher altitude will be pressing you to do their work. Fame and fortune? Do you really want the exposure and constant hectoring that goes with those? Besides, what comes after all the good things of life? Deterioration and death! Maybe with a little Alzheimer's thrown in for sauce.
4. Remember that you're owed. You know you're not paid what you're worth. You know you're not appreciated for the full extent of your virtues. And you know that not only aren't you adequately respected, you'll never be respected without becoming the target of envy. So where are the checks, the testimonials, and the complimentary twenty-four hour armed guards, each one ready to sacrifice his life and reputation to protect yours?
5. Above all, remember that no good deed goes unpunished. Review history; isn't it so? Hasn't every extension of self been followed by an angry demand for more? Hasn't every act of charity prompted resentment from its beneficiaries? Haven't even your refusals to yield to temptations, indulgences that would cost you little or nothing, been "rewarded" by snickering from those around you about being a Little Goody Two-Shoes?
The above will give you a good start on attaining Journeyman Curmudgeon status. (You can have the advanced course for just three easy payments of $39.95. Sign here.) If you need a little more to cement you firmly into unyielding crankhood, your Curmudgeon has one additional suggestion:
Read three major newspapers every day.
